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 The Rules of Romance:
Romance is sort of
like a wonderful way in which people can balance each other. This
can come about in a lot of different ways that are probably already
occurring in your relationship. You simply don’t know how to
see it yet. Think about what has changed about your since you married
your spouse. You can probably say that quite a bit has changed. Now
think about how much hasn’t changed since you got married. You
can probably say that quite a bit hasn’t changed as well. Your
spouse, your love and your romance offer the opportunity to balance
your relationship beautifully.
You may feel threatened
in some way when you think about surrendering completely to your love
for your spouse. Remember that you can always lose yourself in that
love without risking losing your individuality. You can also allow
yourself and even embrace change without losing what it is about you
that make you unique. Compromise is always possible without having
to compromise who you are. Growth is always possible and it never
has to mean growing apart. You and your spouse are capable of having
disagreements without arguments. You can allow yourself to experience
emotion and feelings without losing control of yourself.
Trust is essential
in any relationship- especially a marriage. You can give in to your
partner without the fear of losing anything. You can open up to him
or her without the fear of being judged. It is possible to keep the
passion alive in your marriage for the duration of your lifetime;
you can remain a responsible adult while indulging in your inner child
and the only time you are truly known is in your intimate, long-term
relationship- your marriage.
Your lover cannot know
who you truly are unless you open up your heart completely. You cannot
be a participant in a loving relationship without being vulnerable.
Being intimate always comes with a risk even if you are with your
spouse and you must be willing to face that risk.
Both you and your spouse
need to make sure that you create a supportive environment or else
you will never be able to share your feelings freely with each other.
Spontaneity and control don’t work well together. In fact, they
can’t work together at all. If control is an issue for either
you and/or your spouse, it needs to be addressed. You will never be
able to be interdependent with your spouse unless you are first able
to be independent on your own. Dependence is a harmful thing in any
relationship and it must be changed into a healthy dependence.
Both spouses need to
be open to the fact that neither of you can grow without learning
from your mistakes. Once you learn how to forgive yourself, you can
learn how to forgive others and grudges cannot be held. Broken hearts
will not heal unless that heart is put at risk again.
The point of romance
is to grow together in love and intimacy. Love and intimacy can mean
a number of different things to different people and all of them are
essential to a healthy relationship. Live together, learn together,
grow together, and love together.
Continue to learn about
your spouse and what makes your relationship work. One of the most
common ways that people learn is from their mistakes.
 My good Marriage Sponsors;
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